hey nicole, this is becca ya i kinda hacked in and fixed stuff because ur page was loading weird, so ya i also made all the lines on the date match up and got rid of the huge search bar. hope u dont mind. btw u put ur lays in wrong. thats why it loaded weird.

so talk,
come on and open up
it's only me,
it's the same old me
the one you used to love

We never really grow up .. We're still who we were when we were 10. Still just as immature, ready to have fun & admit that you still love to hang out at the playground .. The only difference is we've all had our hearts broken .. & that's what really changed us.

But as human beings sometimes it's better to stay in the dark. Because, in the dark there may be fear- but theres also hope.

I never, ever stop wondering,
wondering if you still think of us.
I don't need a photograph,
'cause you never left my mind.
No, you never left my mind.

Illusion never changed into something real.
I'm wide awake and i can see the perfect sky is torn

we spend our lives letting the world tell us who we are

oh how cliche it is to sing about the stars
when they burnt out about ten years ago

You're obsessed with finding a new brain
But what you need is a new body
It feels your brain has lived a thousand lives before
And the skin you call your home
Holds a heart that quits and knees that buckle in
And lungs that can't breathe when they're alone

The thing is, we didn't have to hate each other for getting older. We just had to forgive ourselves...for growing up.

I guess we feel it's safer holding back

we tried to wash our hands of all of this we
never talked of our lacking relationships and now
i'm guilt stricken, sobbing with my head on the floor

the pain she's held in for so long
is slowly starting to show
the cuts and scars on her wrist
tell all you need to know

to think I might not see those eyes makes it so
hard not to cry and as we say our long goodbye
I nearly do

The perfect ones.
The beautiful ones.
The right ones, the just ones, the noble ones.
The ones who never break down crying in restaurants, who never do anything in secret that they would be ashamed of.
The normal ones.
The healthy ones.
The ones who always plan ahead.
The content ones.
The happy ones.
The ones who work hard and reap the benefits, who brush and floss after every single meal.
The well-adjusted ones.
The popular ones.
The ones who never disappoint, the little boys who do grow up to be president.
The lucky ones.
The ones with perfect skin and perfect teeth and perfect figures.
The ones who want what they have and have what they want.
They don't exist.
The ones posing as them are even more fucked up than you

she no longer smiles
she simply just shakes
her heart is a mess of pieces
shes had too many heartbreaks

We are too young to live without hope

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New Layout, cause I have had that old one since I first started this site in November I think it was...anyway...tell me what you think about it, cause I'm not sure yet!!!

The sky has lost its colour,
The sun has turned to grey.
At least that's how it feels
To me almost everyday.

&& Everyone knows shes hit rock bottom
They think she cant get lower
So they tease her longer.
What they don’t know is –
Shes been digging a hole for days now.

When did your smile become so fake?
When did the happiness begin to fade away?
When did you become worthless?
When was it exactly that you started to break?

I guess my smile isnt hiding my tears today,
and everyone is asking me what happened,
well nothing happened today...it was just another day...
an ordinary day...preceded by 15 bad years

...Forever was just Forgotten...
quiet
midnight
lock all the doors
and turn out the lights
feels like the end of the world
this Sunday night

I know it's wrong but it feels so right
so I'll just add another scar tonight

always tell someone how you feel. 
mean what you say && say what you mean
even when it's hard because opportunities
are lost in the blink of an eye, 
but regrets can last a lifetime.

there's something i need to tell you.
i love you, you know that.
but i'm just so scared of so many things.
i'm scared of feeling this way,
i'm scared of being so vulnerable
but most of all i'm scared of losing you.

The Perfect Stranger Theory

Short...I know I'm sorry...Comments and Subscribers would make my day though!!!

God saw you were getting tired
& a cure was not meant to be
So he put his arms around you
& whispered come with me
With tearful eyes we watched you
As we saw you pass away
Although we love you deeply
We could not make you stay
Your golden heart stopped beating
Hard working hands at rest
God broke our hearts to prove to us
He only takes the best

Its one AM and im laying in bed
Shaking in my fit of tears.
My love has turned to hate
and i cant forgive and forget this.
Boy, you just arent worth my time
and someday its gonna kill you
that you didnt care enough to save me.

poor little girl, lying on the floor.
her pain written in blood on the wall.
that's what happens, that's what results,
when nobody comes when you call.

i know im not easy to understand.
i know i keep a lot inside, & i know
i'm not the easiest person to read.
but thats okay, you know. cause
even though theres a lot about me
you'll never know, theres a hell alot
more of me you can learn to love.

I'm drowning in these feelings
& it's scaring me to death.
Staring at the ceiling;;
so many things I could have said

And it's happened once again
I'll turn to a friend
Someone that understands
Sees through the master plan
But everybody's gone
And I've been here for too long
To face this on my own
Well I guess this is growing up

You can't save me,
You can't change me,
Well I'm waiting for my wake up call,
and everything's my fault.

So push the seats back a little further
I can see the headlights coming
So push the seats back a little further
Roll the windows down and take a breath
I can see the headlights coming
They paint the world in red and broken glass

So, let's lie in the grass
and stare at the stars.
Live through the moment,
and figure out who we are.

Never meant to cut so deep
Just enough to bleed
Feel the sting as you get closer
Closer and closer to me
Don’t let me hold something so delicate
I’ll shatter it with a word
Don’t say a thing as we get closer and closer
Damn this is gonna hurt

Was I ever crazy? Maybe. Or maybe life is. Crazy isn't being broken or swallowing a dark secret; It's you or me amplified. If you ever told a lie and enjoyed it, If you ever wished you could be a child forever. They were not perfect, but they were my friends and by the '70s, most of them were out living lives. Some I've seen, some never again, but there isn't a day my heart doesn't find them.

I guess I just want to be a kid again. I want to go back to believing in everything and knowing nothing at all.

I think someone's trying to show us a sign That even if we thought it would last The moment would pass My bones will break and my heart would give Oh, it hurts to live

And the skin you call your home holds a heart that quits and knees that buckle in and lungs that can't breathe when they're alone

look at you, a well dressed hypocrite you sing all the songs you hated when you were a kid you know the ones you never knew the words to and that's alright, 'cause you're all grown up

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if I promise not to cry,
can you do me a favor?
for the first time in your life,
look me in the eyes
&& tell me exactly how you feel.

the sky's screaming in the dark,
setting off the car alarms.
so, take it as a warning sign or
maybe just for peace of mind:
when you’re scratching at your scars,
i’ll remember who you are.

i hope this story lets you knwo how you left me to feel inside.
&& i hope this city screams when they read what you've done to me.
my biography is about a boy who killed a girl ;;
who thought that she was his entire world.
&& when they find me on the bathroom floor,
i hope your world caves in, exactly like mind did.

it's like you get homesick .. for a
place that doesnt exist.

Do you know what it's like to be me?
Go through sumthing not everyone can see?
Do you know what its like to walk in my shoes?
Please stop judging me simply cuz I'm not you...

It’s an addiction that can’t be fixed
&& it hurts cause the pieces don’t fit

It’s the saddest songs on the saddest nights that make us cry
And with that we sit back prepared to watch our dreams die
The stars burn up and leave us in the dark
Our shadows brighter than our hearts.

Spell it out in a song,
bet you never catch on
to my weakness
I'm singing every word for you

shaking on the outside because of what im feeling inside

Dearly beloved, we are gathered here today to mourn the un-mailed letters and the lonely Decembers. The children ask, does it ever go away? Asking about heartache &you know better than to lie... so you answer truthfully and you say, no, it doesn't. It doesn't go away. One day youre jumping in puddles and the next thing you know 30 years have passed and you're telling your kids to walk around them. Everyone is taught to look both ways before crossing the street and to talk quietly in the library.. But no one ever learns anything that matters, like how to keep breathing when your heart breaks in half.

Some people have one of those days,
I have one of those lives.

 I don't cry anymore,
&& I don't feel pain.
you can do whatever you'd like,
&& I won't go insane.
&& I don't hate you anymore.
&& no, that is not a lie.
&& you can't kill me anymore,
because honey, I already died

Sorry thats it I guess, I dont wanna finish it now cause its my birthday and I want to do something wild and crazy but thats not gonna happen haha!! Comment and Subscribe please!!